Miss me?

Please continue in that case.

This is not a blogpost.

I, a 24 year old man, live the life of a 13 year old girl. God help me.

Don't Read This

Those who know where to look
Can tell that the walls are hollow
My angel
Despite all your efforts
to convince me otherwise
That they are as solid as they ever were
I can see the hairline fractures
like no one else can.

Smile for me my darling
That specific exquisite smile
It is tinged with the scent
Of the springs final blossom
Crunched underfoot
(I find it ironic how beauty
Is most poignant right after its massacre)

Laugh for me
My precious
That special laugh
The one you conjure up
From that faded grey plane
Where faith and desolation live
Side by side

They say that one gulp
From a special well
shall eternally cure us
Of all thirst
Its water (so cool so sweet so pure that it is sacred)
Drips from your eyes.

0_0

Written on a sialkoti wedding card:

Your presence will make this a hilarious and cherishable occasion for us.

Yeah.

Sachai

Dear Sirs and Madams,

Although this is somewhat against my character, I envy you. In no
small way, I envy some of you. Intensely.

Love

-Ali

Shoes

Not my best work... But I think it makes an interesting point. Kya
khyaal?

Cheap imitation leather shoes
They walk so many miles
Each scratch and scuff and crease
Reminders of a persona
Forged through experience

The finest red hide and hard heels
They've walked few miles but travelled
Thousands burning thousandyearoldbones
They carry a tag that state
natural creases and scratches and scuffs
May appear on the finished shoe
Reminders of a persona
Feigning.

Not Much Subtlety Here...

Sometimes it becomes very very difficult to hang on. No money. No
friends. No work-I-enjoy, no respect, no growth. But what is it that I
hold on to? Even if I let go, there is no place for me to fall. I'm so
completely, utterly, trapped.

...but it feels just like I'm sinking, and I claw for solid ground...

No one I can confide in here (Precious, I would have exploded by now,
if not for you) there is no place I can turn to for a bit of numbness-
at least. I can't leave the house without being asked where I'm going,
or by when I'll be back. Nothing is being learnt. Nothing is being
accomplished, except at the most agonizing snails pace.

I was happy before I came here. I was sought after, respected.

Now I'm constantly criticized for my cloths, how I walk, how i talk,
my diffetence in values,for being 'dheela', not keeping in mind every
desire that most people my age take for granted being sacrificed for
those I love.. Fuck all of you. Bhainchod. Fuck you fuck you fuckyou
fuckyou
fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyouFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU

FUCK.

YOU.

PRESUMPTUOUS.

NARROW MINDED.

COMFORMIST.

CONTROLLING.

SELF-RIGHTEOUS.

BASTARDS.

*breathes*

And he said with a look of particularly elegent sadness, tinged by a
dash of pity '...what would you, beta, if I died tomorrow? Do you know
how malicious the world is? How would you survive?'

Thank you father, for the vote of confidence.